Finding and Keeping
Your Soul Mate

Released: February 2011
Sold to date: 10,000 + copies
Now in its 3rd printing

Who you are going to marry, might just be the biggest decision of your life.

Shouldn’t you have a solid, Torah based, approach to making the right choice?!

The shadchan says in that singsong voice, “So tell me what you’re looking for?”

And out comes the laundry list:
“I need someone who is extroverted funny, and outgoing.”
“I need a woman who is very frum, tolerant, and kind.”
“I need a bachur who is a take-charge type, strong, but not headstrong.”

The lists are long, and the benchmarks are detailed and specific. And unwittingly, that is how many people make their first big mistake in dating. They aren’t looking for their bashert (predestined match); they have already formed him/her in their minds, and now they’re looking for the one that comes the closest to that image.

• Avoid the two big mistakes that most people make when dating.
• What to look for, what not to look for in a spouse (Some of these may surprise you)
• The biggest mistake married couples make
• What happens if you think you married the wrong one? (This happens more often than most people realize)

What readers are saying:

“it helped me put my priorities in order”

I would like to thank you for your various writings about looking and dating – it helped me put my priorities in order.

Eli M.

“Job well done!!”

Job well done!! I have a much clearer idea of what to look out for. It is explained so well and thorough. A must read for anyone dating! Thank You and Hatzlacha.

Sarah C.

“beautifully said and right on target”

Ditto! This is beautifully said and right on target. It also reflects how I felt when I met my husband and highlights issues that I see with people looking for a shidduch all the time.


“one of your best efforts”

This is an uncommonly important book and, I think, one of your best efforts. I went into the process looking for my bashert – not Ms. Potato Head; and what you write describes almost exactly how both my failed dating experiences and my shidduch worked out, as you well know. I wish you and the dating public hatzlacha with it


“Best Shidduch!”


Fay F.

“honey to my soul”

Your style of writing is like honey to my soul.

Moshe B.

What Rabbi’s are saying:

“A must Read!”

So many assumptions that I had, regarding Torah, wisdom, conduct and attitude, have been reshaped by the Shmuz. This is a powerful book

Rabbi Hanoch Teller
Noted Author and Speaker

“Read this book!”

This enjoyable and highly engaging volume will gently propel the reader to view life from a loftier vantage point. Read it and soar!

Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetsky
Rosh Yeshiva, South Shore Yeshiva

“Rabbi Shafier has done it again!”

A groundbreaking volume that will change lives. Here is a book you will have a hard time putting down

Rabbi Pinchus Jung
Noted Mechanech

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