31. All love Comes from HASHEM

Bitachon (trust) is based on knowing that Hashem loves me more than I love me. The Chovos Halevavos explains another way to gain that perspective is to focus on one simple understanding: Any mercy that I’ve experienced in my entire life was created and directed by Hashem. Anyone who showed me love or concern, that love, that concern, was created and directed by Hashem.

Meaning to say, my parents took care of me, my parents loved me. When I was bleeding as a little child and I thought all of my blood would fall out through that cut and I went running to my mother and my mother lovingly picked me up, I have to understand that that maternal instinct was created by Hashem, and that feeling within my mother to want to help me was directed by Hashem.

Any love that I’ve ever experienced, any care, was directed by Hashem. Hashem didn’t just create the instinct, but Hashem runs the world throughout my entire existence. And anything that I experience of kindness and goodliness of people, any time I was showered with love and attention, Hashem wanted that to be. And when I look back on my life and I recognize all of the kindness that was shown to me, and I recognize that all of that was directed from Hashem, I begin understanding it. Hashem wants my betterment. Hashem created me because He wants me to experience the good, He wants me to succeed, Hashem wants my betterment; Hashem loves me even more than I love me.